Matt Jones
Updated: Aug 20, 2021
Have you ever had those moments in your life where it feels like everything is crumbling around you? Maybe you lost your job? Had a relationship breakup? Maybe you're in jeopardy of being evicted or you lost a friend? Maybe a few of these combined at the same time? Maybe someone close to you has died, or fallen really ill. Whatever it is, Life can hit at us really hard sometimes. As a result we become scared, anxious, and maybe even depressed. It feels like there is no light at the end of the tunnel and you're going to be miserable forever. You have trouble sleeping. You have trouble coping with day to day life and just want to lay in bed all day. Sounds pretty good, right? I've been there. It sucks. When the power of positive thinking isn't always there to bail you out, you need other options. Let's talk about pulling the emergency chute when life sucks and hands you a shit sandwich.
For most people 2020 hasn't exactly gone according to plan. It's been a transformational year for everyone. There's been a revolution of the mind. Some people have dealt with crushing circumstances. For the first time many people have taken more stock in their lives and figured out what's truly important to them. What do they want and what really matters?
Whatever your personal circumstance, I want to discuss with you how to deal with overwhelming circumstances so that you can hopefully gain some inner peace and clarity. If you're having mental health issues, it's always good to get the help of a professional who can help you navigate the hard times. But, if that's just not an option for you, I offer you the following.
Let's start by discussing what overwhelmed is. Being overwhelmed is described in the dictionary as to be completely submerged by your thoughts and emotions about all of life's current problems, to the point where you lack efficacy and feel frozen or paralyzed.
So, when you feel stuck, when you feel overwhelmed, your body has as a chemical reaction. What it's doing is warning you. This is ingrained in our fight or flight response. Cortisol (the stress hormone) floods the bloodstream. As a result, a physiological response happens. Normal functions of life become harder to navigate because you have a stress cocktail that has completely taken over your mind and body. There is a new resistance.
Carl Jung famously said that
"what we resist, persists"
So, when we try to resist the sad feelings, we end up bringing more of it into our lives - because we don't want to deal with or accept the circumstances. If you've ever had debt problems - when you don't take it seriously in life, it only brings more of it into your life. You put it off and don't solve the problem, so it keeps happening. Feeling sad and overwhelmed works the same way.
So first thing is:
1) ACCEPT YOUR FEELINGS
It's alright to be sad. It's alright to feel badly. Accept the resistance. Your body is talking to you. Now is your opportunity to dissect this feeling so that you can understand it, and then transform it. Sometimes things aren't as bad as they seem. Sometimes we learn in life that in hindsight, if this bad thing wouldn't have happened, then we wouldn't have received the good that came out of it.
2) REACH OUT TO A LOVED ONE FOR HELP
Sometimes we just need someone else to give us some sense of assurance and support. Someone to just hold our hand and tell us we're pretty..... When we're "in it" emotionally and mentally, we can't always see clearly and there is mental distortion. Looking for help from a loving family member or friend is the best way to start unloading the emotions as well. It's a very therapeutic process.
3) DEEP BREATHING EXERCISES
When we're feeling overwhelmed our heart beat becomes fast and erratic. By doing deep breathing exercises we can slow down our heart beat, naturally reducing anxiety. A good rule is to breath in deeply for 6 seconds, hold your breath for six seconds, and then deep breath out. Do this over and over for several minutes and you will feel yourself slowly relaxing.
May things in life cause us to feel overwhelmed. This can be due to:
-Relationship issues
-Money issues
-Work issues
-Verbal abuse
-Loss of a friend or loved one
-State of the world concerns
-Becoming a new parent
-Loss of sleep
-Lack of direction/fear of the future
These are some of the most common reasons for feeling overwhelmed. It's important to remember that they are only problems as long as we don't solve them, giving them ultimate power over us. So, work on taking your power back.
Always remember that:
Between what happens to us and our reaction to it is the freedom to choose our reaction.
We always have the freedom to choose how we want to act to any situation in life. We are in control, always. We just have to remember that.
1) Crying uncontrollably
2) Lack of interest in work and responsibilities
3) Feeling of hopelessness/lack of energy
4) Constant anxiety all day
5) Strong difficulty in making decisions
1) Get active - Run - Do pushups - Do Jumping jacks. This releases endorphins which give us those happy feelings.
2) Meditate and do deep breathing
3) Take natural supplements that help with relaxing and boost Serotonin.
4) Listen to relaxing music
Just remember that you are not alone. When we go through extreme difficulty, it feels like it's going to last forever. However, if you trace back to your past, chances are you've felt this same way before, and everything turned out fine. We are humans. We adapt. You got this.
Wishing you love, peace, and joy.
Matt Jones is a writer and entrepreneur with multiple businesses who loves inspiring others to reach their full potential. He is also a musician, educator, and world traveler whom has been to over 40 different countries on all 7 continents.
His personal mission is to create and inspire. He is from Los Angeles, but is now based in greater London.